Roots

It started with Cool Whip and ended with Greek yogurt.

Greg and I flew to Colorado to attend a Denver Broncos game and I squeezed in an afternoon with Rat. Rat is the baby of my family, born one wintery morning while I was at 4th grade recess. She looked like a Precious Moments doll until she hit junior high and then morphed into a model overnight. Naturally blonde, acneless, and master of self tanner. I'd hate her if I didn't love her so much.

Click to read more ...

THE DOGS

We have THE DOGS.

THE DOGS is a term for total laziness at our house. The phrase is a derivative of the dog days of summer, altered by a young RE who knew no better when she said, "I have the dogs," meaning, "It's too hot to do anything." The phrase stuck and our family coins it when the time is appropriate. Like today.

Summer is a fading bloom, triple-digit temps have waved farewell, and yet today all three of us have THE DOGS. RE spent the morning vacuuming our house and wanted to be tardy to school (I checked if pigs were flying). Greg has cankers from work stress and wants to go on vacation...again. I baked homemade crackers and went through my kitchen piles until noon. At that point I realized that I hadn't brushed my teeth yet and added two mini Twix bars to the plaque fort being built in my mouth. Then I sat on the floor trying to decide which unfinished project to tackle next. I decided I would get more done if I stopped baking homemade crackers.

Click to read more ...

Lifeguard

Two parents were teaching their daughter to swim. She was only interested in hanging out by the wall where her feet could touch. The parents realized she would never develop any strength or skill until they pulled her into deeper water. It had to be deep enough that her feet couldn't touch. She flailed and kicked and paddled and cried and thought she was drowning. They never would have let her drown. They were an arm's length from her the whole time. She wasn't so sure about the change until she realized she was swimming. What freedom swimming brought! Hours and hours of playing mermaid, new sights to see with goggles, snack money for ice cream sandwiches, and increased privileges with decreased supervision.

Click to read more ...

Nudge

PRECISION FORCEPS

Sometimes, as a mom, you sit in your car a lot. And then you overuse the word "forcep."

Today, while parked at the bottom of Ticket Hill waiting for RE to descend from a day of junior high, I was searching for entertainment because my phone was dead and there wasn't a scrap of literature to read. I didn't want to waste my emergency snack (a packet of Justin's chocolate hazelnut butter) because I wasn't really starving. I rifled through the center console and found a miniature first aid kit to play with. In it was a little tube containing PRECISION FORCEPS. Excuse me, I thought we called them tweezers. I only want to pull out a hair, not a baby.

Click to read more ...